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November 30, 2003
The Patriette Quails at the Cold

A big thank-you to the Patriette, who recently included me in her blogroll, but she seems to have an issue with Minnesota. She's applying for doctoral programs and one of her choices is, or was, the University of Minnesota, which is near where I live. (The Patriette adding to the collection of Northern bloggers? How cool would that be?) Inexplicably, this picture may have dissuaded her:

I just have to say that as someone looking into their programs and currently living in Texas, THAT PHOTO DOES NOT MAKE ME WANT TO ATTEND THE UNIVERSITY OF MINNESOTA! It makes every person who's told me that I am insane for wanting to move north because it gets so cold up there seem correct.

Kelly, don't worry about this picture. It's designed to keep out all of the riff-raff from the Paradise that is the Upper Midwest. Just because you can drive pick-ups across our lakes in the wintertime does not mean that Minnesota is unfit for human habitation. I moved from Southern California to live here six years ago, and I've only lost two fingers since then. No, just kidding! Fortunately for my vocabulary, I still have all of my fingers.

Doesn't the sun shine there from time to time?

Yes, we have lovely sunshine all twelve months of the year. However, as we discovered shortly after moving here, a bright sunny day in the middle of winter is not a good sign. In fact, it means that it's colder than Ba'athist compassion -- I mean, it's like tongues-freezing-to-flagpoles, tears-freezing-to-cheeks cold. That's when we all go to the Mall of America, or our favorite pub, or just stay the hell indoors.

Anyway, don't let that little picture throw you too much. As you can plainly see, the weather wasn't bad enough to discourage scores of people from riding their bicycles! And when you do get up here, make sure you let us all know so that we can show you where the frozen lakes are at.

Sphere It Digg! View blog reactions
Posted by Ed Morrissey at November 30, 2003 5:08 PM

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