John Kerry has decided to broaden his public appeal by branching into humor -- deliberately, as it turns out, rather than just being a joke as in 2004. He delivered his highbrow brand of humor at a DSCC fundraiser last weekend, but the Hill just got around to reporting it on Friday. His joke came at the expense of his colleague, David Vitter, and his woes from the connection to a criminal case of prostitution (via The Moderate Voice):
Speaking at a Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee (DSCC) fundraiser last weekend, Kerry recited a five-line poem about Sen. David Vitter (R-La.), who recently found himself in hot water when his phone number showed up on the records of a woman accused of running a Washington prostitution ring. ...
Kerry made light of the situation with a limerick when he spoke at the event, which was held, appropriately enough, in Nantucket, Mass.
“There once was a man named Vitter/Who vowed that he wasn’t a quitter/But with stories of women/And all of his sinnin’/He knows his career’s in the — oh, never mind,” Kerry said.
Yes, what a classy display that must have been! John Kerry, whose relevance has continued to diminish after his run as the worst major-party presidential candidate since his Massachussetts colleague Mchael Dukakis, decided to score a few points for hipness by attacking Vitter. As limericks go, the best that can be said for Kerry's poetry is that it rhymes. It doesn't take much imagination to match up Vitter with "s*****r". Vitter's grammar-school classmates undoubtably did that much by the time they turned eight, which is apparently Kerry's emotional age.
Besides, if Democrats want to make fun of women & sinnin', Republicans will have no problem mentioning the husband of their current presidential-primary frontrunner. Bill Clinton's track record makes Vitter look like a cloistered nun. And although Vitter broke the law, at least none of his paramours ended up dead in the back of a car, unlike Kerry's colleague in the Senate. Interestingly, that didn't put Ted Kennedy's political career in the toilet, although it should have done so.
In the interest of political humor, though, we should attempt to help Kerry improve his limerick writing. Be sure to offer your own limericks in the comments section. I'll post the best of them here later today!